CURIOUS? A black and white God in a fifty shades of grey world.
Curious? Aren’t you.
The ads are everywhere 3000 times a day someone is trying to get you to buy into the 50 shades of gray World system. And lately the lead line is- Curious?
Four years ago a friend whispered during lunch, “Have you read that new book, Fifty Shades of Grey?” I hadn’t heard about it yet, but within a month there were stacks of paperbacks in Sam’s and I was seeing it in high school girl’s hands and the buzz was building past the beauty salon and gym.
I read it because I was curious.
Christian women were asking me about it and I didn’t have a ready answer or a segue to bring the gospel into a conversation with unbelievers. So I used that for a righteous excuse to read a dirty book. It wasn’t the first book with sex in it that I had read, I’ve read the #1 best seller, the Bible, and it has a lot of sex in it too. God doesn’t give us the titillating details but from the steamy stanzas of the Song of Solomon to the threshing floor with Ruth and Boaz sexual sparks are kindling into fire throughout the Bible. Some forget God designed sex (Gen2), God commands sexual intimacy for the married (1cor7) and God warns us about the destruction of lust (romans 1). He also records all the varied ways Biblical characters, many of them the heroes of the faith, failed in this area and we read stories about rape, incest, homosexuality, infidelity, abandonment and abuse.
“These things happened to them as examples and were written down as warnings for us, on whom the culmination of the ages has come. So, if you think you are standing firm, be careful that you don’t fall! No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to mankind. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can endure it.” 1 cor 10:11-3
Curiosity is a clever little word. It’s tricky. It lures the mind and shows you ‘the door’ concealing what’s really behind it. It asks with a bit of a hissing lisp, “Don’t you want to see what’s inside?” It even reminds you as you glance at the door, “Remember, the rules, “Thou shall not open that door. Good people don’t even touch that door.” But ‘rules are made to be broken’ because fear is imperfect and desire is powerful and we all have a little rebellious attitude in our fallen DNA that makes us sneak our hand into the cookie jar. The television, the radio, the internet and the ‘in’ crowd remind us that the door is still there. And we are outside it, left out. We are enticed. Curiosity now helps you scheme, a way to sneak really, justify, rationalize, find an excuse. And a way. The secret passage. In the dark our hand is on the door. And we open it ultimately to find it wasn’t curiosity at all. We got conned in a system as old as time called temptation.
“The temptation to give in to evil comes from us and only us. We have no one to blame but the leering, seducing flare-up of our own lust. Lust gets pregnant, and has a baby: sin! Sin grows up to adulthood, and becomes a real killer.” James 1:13-15
Curiosity doesn’t just kill the cat, it kills our innocence. We know now. More than a loving God wanted us to ever experience. We know. Now. Our eyes are open. And there is a kind of death that happens inside of us. We can’t go back. We have seen, we have heard, we have experienced, what God wanted to protect us from.
Reading Fifty Shades of Gray, my curiosity had opened a door into a story world of domination. Terms were like a foreign language and though I knew the writer was plotting out a redemptive love story with very compelling characters there was nothing romantic about the intimate partner violence (IPV) in nearly every interaction between the two main characters. The abuse included: stalking, intimidation, isolation as well as other forms of physical abuse none of which are the foundation of a healthy relationship or could be in any way twisted to define love. God is love and He defines the way of love in 1 Cor 13 as being patient, kind and unselfish, caring more about others than self.
I read Fifty Shades of Gray over memorial weekend at our family’s lake house and remember my college age niece seeing the book and saying, “I read that. All my friends have read it.” I closed the book and cried. Fully convicted. Fully convinced that our culture had opened a door and behind it was devastating deception and destruction to God’s truth about love. I loved my niece. She was young and impressionable and innocent and her Millennial generation’s Cinderella story had a new name, Fifty Shades of Gray.
That’s the problem we should have with 50 Shades of Grey – not just the sex, but the acceptance of the deception of the truth and the introduction of domination and sexual submission, of absolute power and acceptance of abuse in a relationship as the new norm in our culture which was founded on freedom.
Don’t be tempted by your curiosity. Knowing the truth will set you free and love, not fear, will commit you to overcome your curiosity and not open the door. There is a way out of this curious romanticized lie, stand for the truth, for love and for women. Know the facts and tell your friends.
Twenty-five percent of women are affected by intimate partner violence (IPV) romanticized in Fifty Shades of Grey.
Twenty-five percent.
1 in 4 women live Fifty Shades of Grey as their real life story with no happy ending.
Instead of spending $50 dollars to see this movie that romanticizes abuse, help those already affected by intimate partner violence (IPV) by joining the #50dollarsnot50shades campaign.
Spread the news. Encourage your friends to skip the movie and donate $50 to shelters and agencies that support abused women.
I donated to Shared Hope International but I know the time you spend to search for a charity in your area will be personally beneficial to you and a blessing to others. Live Loved.
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